Though I cannot recall everything, I can testify that I remember every single moment. Everything and nothing sway in a perfect balance in our own minds to form a cyclone of memories that can compare to the greatest human stories ever told. It happened here in small mid-western cities, under warm fraternal nights, and cold lonely evenings. Be it the true friendship we all had or the many beverages that fueled those short years, we were there. Standing on decks of small apartment complexes or sitting by fires in rural suburbia, we formed the foundation of the beginnings of our lives. Branding each other with fires so realistically warm, you could feel it on your forearm. Breaking bread and bottle together, we wastefully made something and nothing of ourselves. - Mr. L-Dolla Beats through a Heart By Chas D. Culp AuthorHouse Copyright © 2009 Chas D. Culp All right reserved. ISBN: 978-1-4389-6755-4 Chapter One Twenty-Three You can't be a hero forever. You can't fight the dawn of new day. These are the words. This is the voice. I'm here. At least for now ... The Strengthened Green A breath is bleeding fog, Billowing out an orifice. Legs twisting as trees Deeply rooted to a meadow. A sun is covered in cloud, Above the hills, rolling to mountains. I am miserably alive, Surrounded by this flowered frost. The shanty is my home, A warm speck in the distance, While the everlasting green surrounds, Treating me to this trance. The mustang twitches, Swatting shivers off its tail As the chill of wind goes whipping, Slicing this murky meadowed valley. My ears shine red of sting, Soft soil sticks to shoe. My scarf of itchy comfort Strangles away common cold. I am but a being, As equal as the horse. The chill of morning cuts us both While strengthening the green. Swayed To the twang and the twinkle Of an honest man's guitar, Sweet lyrics meant for me. Some part of it, Perhaps a soul, Tries to escape with every pulse, For I move like wild water, Not knowing why. What is churning But my own inner elegance? What is throbbing But the beats through a heart? I am entranced By an illness, airborne. Both of us Moving in waves. The moon is brighter. The girl has never been more beautiful. Every note notifies my spirit. Every pause releases my potential. Not a muscle goes unjarred. Picking and singing, Scraping and shuddering, Swaying as a leaf In a gated field of trees. The Challenge with Sin I'm too awake to sleep, But too tired to dream. I try to break in this bed, Yet the bed tends to lean. Speaking to a messenger moon Under deep glows of warm. I sit covered, in my cocoon, Churning questions of many forms. I am pleased with myself, But are you pleased with me? I'm not asking for help, Just for someone to oversee. An ever-changing place Covered by starlight. Reflecting this beacon of grace, Godly given to the night. I ask you, should I preach from the hill, Or find love and conceive? Is it just in his will I will always believe? Is my life nothing But a long test left of faith? Rewarding angels to sing Once he opens my gate? Am I destined for something Past my society's standard? Or will I be the one lonely king With a wish left unanswered? I don't ask for anything I can't get myself. But time is a drawstring With a life set to melt. My only wish, To be given a chance, Before I am squished By safety and circumstance. So if you have me an answer, Just set me a sign, And I'll remain the true dancer With a confident mind. What One Can See With what one can see Through these two eyes Is an unknown world Of impeccable size. I don't understand mountains. I can't comprehend trees. Yet I am happy in this world With what one can see. When I am forced to stop looking, I stall and I think. An instant is gone, A deep moment sinks. When viewing my earth As a memory to save, I am vanquished from a present To a philosopher's cave. All light is masked. I, left to the cold, Finding no comfort Under the rock and the fold. Instead I burn breaths Filtering forest-fresh air, Becoming one with this world That I daily wear. The oxygen stales From the cave to the city. Trees exhale thin While swaying with pity. Give me a wood Where I lose only time. Give me a range Crowned by one peak I find. You can keep your ideas, Your finance and power. All I need is a meadow And one confident flower. I know it's not much, But to me, this is me. This world was made perfect With what one can see. An Aqua Inning My lungs ache with pain. I just can't breathe. I want to go under, But I just can't leave. I am stuck in the middle Of a land I can't escape. I try to sit still, But this feeling won't wait. I want to wake up worthless, But the world won't let me be. The only true reliance Is the movement of the sea. All I need is a sudden gesture To plan my aqua inning. It is then that I swim freely, Like I did at man's beginning. I want to meet a goby fi