What keeps a team performing at its peak even under the most difficult conditions? Conversational capacity: the ability to have open, balanced, nondefensive dialogue In a world of mounting complexity and rapid-fire change, it's more important than ever to build teams that work well when the pressure is on. Craig Weber provides managers and team leaders with the communication tools they need to ensure that the team remains on track even when dealing with its most troublesome issues, responds to tough challenges with greater agility and skill, and performs brilliantly in circumstances that incapacitate less disciplined teams. Craig Weber is an international consultant specializing in team and leadership development. Craig Weber is an international consultant specializing in team and leadership development. His clients include Boeing, Pfizer, Novo Nordisk, the Royal Bank of Canada, NASA, and the Centers for Disease Control. Craig Weber is an international consultant specializing in team and leadership development. His clients include Boeing, Pfizer, Novo Nordisk, the Royal Bank of Canada, NASA, and the Centers for Disease Control. CONVERSATIONAL CAPACITY The Secret to Building Successful Teams That Perform When the Pressure Is On By CRAIG WEBER The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. Copyright © 2013 Craig Weber. Inc. All rights reserved. ISBN: 978-0-07-180712-8 Contents AcknowledgmentsIntroduction: Standing on the Shoulders of GiantsChapter 1: Conversational Capacity: The Missing Piece of the PuzzleChapter 2: Intentional Conflict: Why Good Intentions Are Never EnoughChapter 3: Beyond Fight and Flight: A More Intentional MindsetChapter 4: Intentional Dialogue: Skills for Balancing Candor and CuriosityChapter 5: Cultivating Our Better AngelsChapter 6: Conversational Capacity and the Value of ConflictChapter 7: Conversational Capacity and Adaptive LearningChapter 8: The Work of Building a Disciplined TeamChapter 9: Conversational Capacity and the Challenge of Team LeadershipConclusion: The Road Less TraveledNotesIndex Excerpt CHAPTER 1 Conversational Capacity THE MISSING PIECE OF THE PUZZLE Management's business isbuilding organizations that work JOAN MAGRETTA In elementary school I had a friend named David. One sunny day at recess, David,an epileptic, fell to the ground in the grips of a violent seizure. By the timeI noticed what was happening, not only was David in physical distress, he wasalso surrounded by a group of students who were laughing at him, calling himnames, and making fun. It was an ugly scene. Shocked, I raced over with the clearest of intentions—to help David getthrough the seizure without injuring himself and to defend him from those kidsgiving him grief. I knew what to do and I had every intention of doing it, butas I reached my friend, a disturbing thing happened: I froze in my tracks. Ididn't say a word. I didn't help my friend. I didn't know it then, but I had fallen victim to a powerful dilemma that oftencauses our intentions and our behavior to part ways. On the one hand, my goalwas to help my friend, but on the other, it was to avoid being ridiculed andcriticized. I wanted to speak up and help, but I also wanted to remain safe andsecure. It's clear now that the latter intention was the more powerful of thetwo, and that there were two seizures on the playground that day—David'sepileptic seizure and my intentional seizure. At the time I thought it was just me, that I suffered from some unrecognizeddisability with which most people are unencumbered. Or even worse, I worriedthat I was simply a coward, too afraid to take a stand for my friend when itcounted most. I've since learned that my painful episode on the playgroundreflects a nearly universal human experience. And, after years of academic studyand in-depth work with a wide variety of organizations, I realize my reactionthat day was a symptom of a problem affecting all manner of teams and workrelationships. This problem is not just a minor trifle causing mere inconvenience orembarrassment on playgrounds. Its significance is evident in the experience ofColonel Mike Mullane, a weapons and navigational systems officer on a U.S. AirForce F-111 "Aardvark," a fighter-bomber. Early in his career he was on amission with a pilot with thousands of hours of experience flying this aircraft.When they reached "bingo fuel," the critical point at which there is just enoughfuel to return to base, Mullane saw no response from the pilot. Mullane's firstinstinct was to speak up, to point out that they needed to turn the aircraftaround and head home. At risk, after all, was not just their mission and theirplane, but also their lives. But then, like me on the playground, he experienced an intentional conflict. Onthe one hand, a "little voice" in the back of his brain urged him to raise hisconcern; on the other hand, he didn't want to be labeled a troublemaker, anon–team player, or a "high-maintenance" flight operations officer