You never expected to say goodbye. The most helpful grief book to read when you're ready to start healing after the loss of a loved one. Whether you've lost a parent, partner, child, sibling, friend―or anyone you loved―I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye offers the compassion and clarity you need when grief is sudden, raw, and overwhelming. This trusted guide has helped over a million readers cope with the shock of unexpected loss. Drawing from personal experiences and years of counseling insight, Brook Noel and Dr. Pamela D. Blair provide a steady, judgment-free companion through the most disorienting stages of grief. Inside you'll find: Tools to manage emotional numbness, "grief brain," and trauma responses - Support for navigating anger, guilt, and the myths that block healing - Guidance for grieving children, partners, and families - Ways to honor your loved one while finding meaning and hope again Named a Best Book on Losing a Parent by Choosing Therapy (2022), this book is widely recommended by grief counselors, hospice workers, and peer mentors. "Can hold a hand and comfort a soul through grief's wilderness." ―George C. Kandle, Pastoral Psychologist If you're looking for more than platitudes―if you need practical tools, real stories, and reassurance that healing is possible―this book is here to walk beside you. Brook Noel is a CEO, author, speaker, and mom. She has been featured in hundreds of shows and magazines, including ABC World News, CNN Headline News, and Fox & Friends. She is the author of Good Morning, I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye, The Change Your Life Challenge, and other books. She lives in Wisconsin. Pamela D. Blair, Ph.D. is a psychotherapist and pastoral counselor in private practice in Hawthorne, New York. Excerpt from Chapter Two: Notes for the First Few Weeks "And people answered the phone for me. And people cooked for me. And people understood for me. My dearest friends cared for me when I didn't care." - Wendy Feiereisen At this moment, in the direct aftermath of losing someone tragically, there is so little anyone can say. We cannot find the words to offer you peace - though we wish it were a gift we could give you. We promise you now that we will give you everything we can to help you make your way through this. We will help you wind a path through the haze, the confusion, and the pain that is gripping at your core. For the first few weeks, do not concern yourself with what you will do, where you will go, or what lies in the future. For now, we ask that you simply follow the guidelines in this chapter. There will be time to cope, to understand, to process - later. Right now, you simply need to take care of you. Treat Yourself as if You Were in Intensive Care You are in the process of going through one of the most traumatic experiences a person can endure. The challenges you have already faced, both physically and mentally, will leave you vulnerable, exhausted, and weak. It is imperative that you focus directly on yourself and on any dependents. Find ways to get your needs met first in these few weeks. In the first week or so you will probably feel stunned and overwhelmed. You may also feel numb or hysterical. Your emotional system shuts down, providing temporary insulation from the full impact of your loss. You will go through the motions; it will look like you're coping well sometimes. In her book, The Worst Loss, Barbara D. Rosof writes, "In shock you may be unable to move or speak coherently; people report that they cannot think. Shock responses may also be active and intense; you may have screamed, or run from the room, or physically attacked the bringer of the news. All of these behaviors are means of shutting down, or distancing yourself from a reality that you do not yet have a way to deal with. As you look back, your behavior may seem bizarre and totally out of character for you. Remember that your entire world had been knocked out from under you. You were in free fall, and your first task was to find any way to stop the fall." When the funeral is over and your relatives and friends have gone home, the shock begins to wear off. It is important not to make any decisions that will have a lasting impact on your life (for example, sell the house, give away the person's belongings, etc.) while you are in shock. Expect to Be Distracted During the first few weeks, your mind will be filled with racing thoughts and unfamiliar emotions. Many people report having difficulty with simple tasks. Losing one's keys, forgetting where you are while driving, and sluggish reaction time are all commonly reported problems. With everything you are mentally and physically trying to process, it's normal to be distracted. Take special caution. Try to avoid driving and other activities where these symptoms may cause injury. Have Someone Near You If possible, choose a close friend to keep near you through the first week or two. Let this person help you make decisions, hear your fears o