In Vietnam, your tour ended in the sweltering heat or the constant soaking rain of a tropical monsoon season, where you understood that your life could end at any second. Then one day, maybe a Tuesday, on a plane ride, you were home, still sweating salt from your last meal in Vietnam. "Your mind never got to prepare itself for a country that didn’t want to have to put up with your return. "When you return, you are no longer young. Everyone notices that you’ve changed."There is no happiness like the feeling of stepping onto American soil after having spent a year or more in combat, and there is no depression stronger than the guilt you feel for being happy when others are dead. There is no anger stronger than knowing most of the people you met in your own country wouldn’t have cared all that much if you hadn’t made it home at all. "This whole feeling is multiplied when you realize they forgot to tell you that you might feel guilty about killing other people. Whether you are feeling it for those you killed, for those you couldn’t keep from being killed, or just because you survived and others didn’t, you feel it constantly." Richard’s knees began to shake, and he sat back down. But just as the editor decided to take back the floor, Richard continued. "And it is multiplied by itself every day you are involved. It is amazing to me that so many soldiers return whole." The problems encountered by Vietnam returnees were much more than no parades. --- About the Author John T. Hourihan Jr., a retired journalist, has won state, regional, and national awards for his opinion column in several New England newspapers. He received the Cross of Gallantry for valor in the face of the enemy during his three tours in Vietnam, where he served as a Vietnamese linguist with the 509th RRGP. He is now disabled from the effects of Agent Orange. He lives with his award-winning author wife, Linda Hourihan HHCP (author of The Virtue of Virtues, The Mystery of the Sturbridge Keys, In Their Image and Likeness, My Red Bag of Courage, Nature Spirit Wisdom), in the woods of central Massachusetts. His other works include: The Baltimore Catechism series (Clean Slate, A Year of Confirmation, Mass of the Faithful, Sacrament of Reconciliation) The Eighth Commandment: The Slow Death of Local Journalism The Mustard Seed – 2095, The Mustard Seed – 2110, The Mustard Seed – 2130 Beyond the Fence: Converging Memoirs Parables for a New Age I and ll Play Fair and Win