Parent-tested and approved by the American Youth Soccer Organization (AYSO), this indispensable book by a parent, coach, and doctor shows soccer moms, dads, and coaches how to encourage children to look beyond winning and to turn every game and practice into an opportunity to teach life lessons. Dr. Vincent Fortanasce applies his expertise in child development to guide parents and coaches on: Emphasizing fun over performance and morality over victory - Understanding the way kids think and their capabilities at each developmental stage - Controlling their own touchline behavior - Instilling character, conscience, and courage in every player, regardless of talent In Life Lessons from Soccer , Vincent Fortanasce celebrates the enchantments of soccer as a learning ground for family values and life lessons -- and for becoming closer to your children on and off the field. Psychiatrist and former Olympic athlete Fortanasce is a parent and an experienced youth-league soccer coach. He presents a guide for parents and coaches designed to maximize the youth-league soccer experience for children. Parents and coaches first must understand that very young players process information differently from adults; thus, applying professional coaching techniques won't work. Fortanasce's overall lesson is simple and presented with humor and empathy: think about what you say and how you say it, and remember that children are not little adults. Their emotional needs and intellectual processes must be accommodated for them to reap the maximum benefit from sports participation. The author admonishes parents to remember, above all, that the game is for their kids' benefit and shouldn't be treated as a source of competition between parents. This should be required reading for any parent whose child is venturing into youth-league sports for the first time. It might also open the eyes of those coaches who try to get in touch with their inner Lombardi at the expense of five-year-olds. Wes Lukowsky Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved Dick Wilson former executive director of AYSO In Life Lessons from Soccer , nothing is left to chance....You will learn Dr. Fortanasce's keys to making your child a success. You will learn not only about your child, but also about yourself and how to be the parent who makes a difference....Read on and learn the life lessons that will make your experience in soccer all you hoped it would be. Vincent Fortanasce, MD , a nationally acclaimed psychiatrist, neurologist, and bioethicist, practices at Los Angeles County Hospital, USC. A former Olympic athlete and an experienced soccer and Little League coach, he lives in Pasadena, California. Chapter One: Dreams The 1st Life Lesson: A Child Without a Dream Is Like a Boat Without a Sail Seven-year-old Kathy beamed a smile that could have brightened the rainiest of days. "Mom, Mom!" she cried out excitedly. Her mother was pouring milk into a mug with a picture of Madonna on the side. "What is it?" she asked. "I know what I want to be when I grow up! I want to be like Mia Hamm!" Her mother sighed. "She's not another rock star, is she?" "No, Mom, she's the greatest soccer player ever! I'm gonna be like her, you watch." Her words were spoken with the absolute certainty that only fantasy-laden children can muster. "Can I get a soccer ball and a poster of her maybe? I'll clean my room and vacuum forever. I promise, I promise." Kathy's mom, a corporate lawyer, sighed again and, in the same tone a jury foreman might use to declare a defendant guilty, said, "No. Stop filling your head with childish dreams. You've never even played soccer before, how can you be the greatest player? Eat breakfast, finish your homework, and get ready for school." Suddenly a chill wind swept the sunshine from Kathy's face and clouds covered the twinkle in her eyes. "Don't you realize it's only study and hard work that will help you make something of your life? It's a degree you need, not a poster!" With a few simple words, both Kathy and her dream had been crushed. Dreams Dreams are an inspiration to children. Yes, they are childhood dreams -- to be a professional soccer player, a firefighter, a rock star, or an actress -- but children see these people on TV and it's exciting to them. It's what they talk about at school. Most important, dreams provide motivation, purpose, and direction for a child, no matter how unlikely the dreams are. Nurture the dreams and they will bring spirit, determination, and pleasure to your child. After all, success ultimately is determined by the joy in life. Those childhood dreams will change with age, just as eight-year-old boys hate girls and then grow to love them at eighteen. Today's Dream May Be Tomorrow's Reality Sam wanted to be a soccer player like the great Brazilian player Pelé. But Sam was the smallest in his class, slow, and not very skillful with a soccer ball. However, his parents nev