Living a Year of Kaddish: A Memoir

$25.00
by Ari Goldman

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The best-selling author of The Search for God at Harvard continues his spiritual quest in this heartfelt and poignant account of the year he spent saying kaddish for his father. The day after Ari Goldman celebrated his fiftieth birthday his father died of a heart attack, and Goldman began the ritual year of mourning required by Jewish law. There were the obligations (the daily recitation of kaddish in a synagogue quorum of ten), the prohibitions (no listening to music or buying new clothes), and the self-examination that the death of a parent and the mourning rituals triggered. Death meant coming to terms with a father he loved but never fully understood, in part because of his parents’ divorce and its stormy aftermath. Goldman explores the emotional and spiritual aspects of spending a year in mourning, as he examines its effects on him as a husband, father, and member of his community. Left without parents (his mother died four years earlier), he is no longer a son to anyone, but he comes to understand that through the daily recitation of kaddish, he can both connect with and honor his mother and his father in a way that he could not always do during their lifetimes. And in his daily synagogue attendance—usually near his Manhattan home but also, during the course of his travels in Israel, the Catskills, and France—he finds his fellow worshipers to be an unexpected source of strength, wisdom, and comfort. Living a Year of Kaddish is a deeply affecting journey through grief, loss, and acceptance—a book that will resonate for people of all faiths who struggle with the inevitability of losing the ones they love. A Jewish son is duty bound to recite the kaddish prayer daily for an 11-month period after his father's death, an act of reverence for a deceased parent. In the midst of grief and personal loss, it is an expression of faith and trust in God. Professor Goldman, author of The Search for God at Harvard (1991), examines the spiritual and emotional aspects of this ritual and how this period of mourning affected him in his role as a father and husband. "Sometimes I think of my whole life as a search for my father," Goldman writes, regretting that after his parents had been divorced 44 years earlier, he saw his father as only a "distant presence." Goldman describes the daily recitation of kaddish in an Orthodox synagogue near his Manhattan home and recounts his friendship with the nine other men required by Jewish law to make a minyan. The book is a poignant chronicle of bereavement and solace to be read by Jews and non-Jews alike who mourn the loss of a loved one. George Cohen Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved "This jewel of a memoir explores the paradox of mourning for an observant Jew. It is a time of piercing aloneness and yet of fortifying community, the community of fellow worshippers saying kaddish . With tenderness and honesty, Ari Goldman brings the reader, too, inside that circle of loss and resilience." --Samuel G. Freedman, author of Jew vs. Jew "Ari Goldman has written a loving tribute to the faith he shared with his father and to its power to heal the wound of bereavement." --Rabbi Harold S. Kushner, author of When Bad Things Happen to Good People “A brave and comforting book about losing your parents and finding yourself and your community. Goldman’s chronicle of his year of kaddish is a fine companion while recovering from loss.” —Stephen Fried, author of The New Rabbi: A Congregation Searches for Its Leader The best-selling author of The Search for God at Harvard continues his spiritual quest in this heartfelt and poignant account of the year he spent saying kaddish for his father. The day after Ari Goldman celebrated his fiftieth birthday his father died of a heart attack, and Goldman began the ritual year of mourning required by Jewish law. There were the obligations (the daily recitation of kaddish in a synagogue quorum of ten), the prohibitions (no listening to music or buying new clothes), and the self-examination that the death of a parent and the mourning rituals triggered. Death meant coming to terms with a father he loved but never fully understood, in part because of his parents divorce and its stormy aftermath. Goldman explores the emotional and spiritual aspects of spending a year in mourning, as he examines its effects on him as a husband, father, and member of his community. Left without parents (his mother died four years earlier), he is no longer a son to anyone, but he comes to understand that through the daily recitation of kaddish, he can both connect with and honor his mother and his father in a way that he could not always do during their lifetimes. And in his daily synagogue attendance usually near his Manhattan home but also, during the course of his travels in Israel, the Catskills, and France he finds his fellow worshipers to be an unexpected source of strength, wisdom, and comfort. Living a Year of Kaddish is

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