Experienced mental health professionals and hosts of the Therapist Uncensored podcast offer a groundbreaking new clinical perspective that integrates modern attachment theory, relational neuroscience, and current cultural context to create a hopeful framework for deeper and more permanent change, growth and connection in all types of relationships. "This is the book to hand not just to your clients, but also to friends and family members, along with anyone who's interested in improving their relationships. Which is to say: everyone!" —Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk To Someone and co-host of the Dear Therapists podcast Secure Relating  offers a refreshing and innovative approach to understanding and improving relationships in today's increasingly polarized world. Drawing on over thirty years of professional clinical experience, authors Ann Kelley, PhD and Sue Marriott, LCSW, CGP integrate modern attachment theory, relational neuroscience, and depth psychology into practical tools for deepening self-awareness and navigating closeness with strength in even the most challenging relationships. Instead of the popular broad attachment categorizations,  Secure Relating  presents a nuanced understanding of attachment and interpersonal defensive patterns, allowing readers to delve into the complexities of their own experience and apply the specific skills they need. Kelley and Marriott make complex concepts accessible and relatable, emphasizing the realistic capacity for neural change and psychological growth. They provide contemporary concepts and interactive tools such as the  Modern Attachment Regulation Spectrum,  a new framework that helps readers identify their unconscious defensive patterns, update and revise their personal narratives, and cultivate a secure state of mind amid chaos and adversity.  Secure Relating  delivers hope, connection, and empowerment amidst the many barriers to emotional closeness and provocations towards self-protection by offering a comprehensive approach to understanding and transforming all kinds of relationships into more secure and satisfying bonds. "An incredibly wise and immediately useful book, Secure Relating empowers readers to improve their relationships with themselves, their partners, and their children. Marriott and Kelley’s compassionate, authentic tone, combined with powerful analogies and illustrations, takes their gift for translating clinical and research knowledge to a new level." - Tina Payne Bryson, LCSW, PhD, New York Times bestselling co-author of The Whole-Brain Child “If you have longed for a book that explains modern attachment theory and interpersonal neurobiology in engaging and accessible language,  Secure Relating  is it! Marriott and Kelley have given us a readable, captivating summary of the best insights from relational neuroscience, together with detailed, practical steps about how we can deepen our intimate connections and help improve the world. This book is clear, rich, humble, wise, moving, challenging, and inspiring. I’m better for having read it and am going to recommend it highly to all my friends and psychotherapy clients.” - Stephen E. Finn, PhD, president, Therapeutic Assessment Institute, and author of In Our Clients’ Shoes “ Secure Relating is densely packed with information about attachment security, synthesizing a variety of theories into an easy-to-understand model. It provides an in-depth understanding of how attachment works, told in a relatable manner with plenty of examples. The authors' consideration of how attachment interacts with biological, social and cultural factors is truly impressive." - Kristin Neff, PhD, co-founder of the Center for Mindfulness Studies and author of Fierce Self Compassion “ Secure Relating welcomes the reader to the nuances of our biological programmed attachment dance with wisdom about managing the bumps and crevices when the dance does not go smoothly. Sue Marriott and Ann Kelly's...compassionate approach is built on the best contemporary attachment theory and neuroscience and provides the secure base needed to tackle the challenge of discovering lost pieces of our cherished self and transforming relationships. I look forward to recommending this book to colleagues and clients.” - Carol George, Professor Emerita, Mills College, author of Working with Attachment Trauma "Comprehensive, courageous, creative and clear, Sue Marriott and Ann Kelley expertly and compassionately guide us through a deep understanding of attachment and how to rewire our nervous systems toward more secure and fulfilling relationships. This is a cutting-edge essential read for those at any stage of the self-discovery journey who seek to make meaningful changes in their lives. A wonderful contribution to our collective conversation about how to make our shared world a better place for us all." - Daniel J. Siegel, M.D., New York Times bestselling author of The Whole-Brain C