Mike Ovitz told him his Wilshire Blvd. "foot soldiers" would hunt him down. He's antagonized almost everyone at the top in Tinseltown. And now, Joe Eszterhas tells everything he knows -- in brief, quotable bursts -- about the business, the history of Hollywood, and how to write screenplays that make millions. Idiosyncratic, gruff and as shaggy as Eszterhas himself, The Devil's Guide to Hollywood makes a character/leitmotif of Eszterhas' fellow Hungarian Zsa Zsa Gabor ("Money is like a sixth sense that makes it possible for you to fully enjoy the other five."), and makes the case that Marilyn Monroe was the sharpest tack in Hollywood ("Hollywood is a place where they'll pay you a thousand dollars for a kiss and fifty cents for your soul. I know, because I turned down the first offer often enough and held out for the fifty cents."). Refreshing, dirty, tough, there's no book like it. Eszterhas, whose credits include Basic Instinct , Flashdance , and Jagged Edge, is one of the best-known screenwriters around and has penned a laugh-out-loud funny and useful guide for those who aspire to making it big in Hollywood. Make no mistake: Eszterhas is frank about his aim to write about the commercial aspect of screenwriting. Through quotes, quips, and anecdotes, Eszterhas lays bare the cruel and often downright strange world of moviemaking. From getting paid $4 million for an outline to learning that a rewriter is trying to take credit for one of his films, Eszterhas has an intimate knowledge of the way the business works. He firmly advises aspiring screenwriters not to live in Los Angeles, a city he finds far removed from the rest of the world, and cautions them about talking about their ideas. "Real writers sit down and write; wannabe writers sit around and talk." Aspiring and practical would-be screenwriters looking for good advice will find this offering inspiring and hilarious. Kristine Huntley Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved In The Devil s Guide to Hollywood , bestselling author and legendary bad-boy screenwriter Joe Eszterhas tells everything he knows about the industry, its players, and screenwriting itself from the first blank sheet of paper in the Olivetti to the size of the credit on the one-sheet. The Devil s Guide to Hollywood distills everything one of Hollywood s most accomplished screenwriters knows about the business: from writing advice to negotiation tricks, from the wisdom of past players to the feuds of current ones. Eszterhas dispenses advice as only he can: with his tongue firmly in cheek and a certain finger extended good-naturedly toward the sky. His tips on how to survive in Hollywood are based on his own rugged and real-life experiences: they are not just useful but vastly entertaining. He reveals what he s seen in Hollywood and what he s learned about writing and selling scripts there for record amounts. He also recounts bite-sized takes from personalities he either admires or loathes, sharing the richest, best industry lore that has inspired, amused or enraged him over the years. The Devil s Guide to Hollywood is hilarious, ornery, colorful and wise. It could only have been written by someone who loves the business as much as Eszterhas does but who also has its number. Joe Eszterhas has written fifteen films which have made more than a billion dollars at the box office. Among them are Basic Instinct , Jagged Edge , Flashdance , Showgirls , Betrayed , Music Box and F.I.S.T. He is the author of the recent New York Times bestsellers AMERICAN RHAPSODY and HOLLYWOOD ANIMAL. In 1975, his second book, CHARLIE SIMPSON'S APOCALYPSE, was nominated for the National Book Award. He was a senior editor at Rolling Stone from 1971 to 1975. He lives with his wife, Naomi, and their four sons in Bainbridge Township, Ohio. Part One Pursuing Your Dream Lesson 1 They Can Snort You Here! Why do you want to be a screenwriter? The answer I get from most young wannabe screenwriters is, "Cuz I want to be rich." I tell them what Madonna says: "Money makes you beautiful." And I tell them that I've made a lot of money but that I'll never be beautiful. Why do you want to write a screenplay? Screenwriter/novelist Raymond Chandler (The Blue Dahlia): "Where the money is, so will the jackals gather." You, too, can be a star. My biggest year was 1994. I wrote five scripts in one year. I made almost $10 million. I had houses in Tiburon and Malibu, California, and in Kapalua, Maui. I made half a million dollars for writing a thirty-second television commercial for Chanel No. 5 perfume. I fell in love. I got divorced. I married my second wife. Our first child was born. I had the best tables at Spago and the Ivy and at Granita, Postrio, and Roy's. I had limos in northern California, in Malibu, and on Maui. I ate more, I drank more, I made love more, and I spent more time in the sun than I ever had. The world was my oyster. I became the s