Terms and Conditions May Apply: Purchasing a Wife in a Reputable Manner. Everett Cassian, the ninth Duke of Tolland, needs a wife. Not for romance. Not for companionship. Certainly not for conversation. He must marry by month’s end or lose everything to his idiot cousin. His solution? Select a quiet, penniless spinster from a list. One with no scandal, no ambition, and preferably no opinions. Instead, he gets Lady Clemency Pratt—eccentric inventor, unapologetic disaster, and proud designer of a self-propelled butter churn. She was supposed to be the safe option. Quiet. Invisible. Completely manageable. But she arrives with six trunks, dangerous tea-related contraptions, and an alarming fondness for questions. And Everett, a man who categorizes emotions as avoidable inconveniences , finds himself dangerously close to experiencing… all of them. Now the Duke’s once-orderly estate is a whirring, gossip-fueled mess… and he might be falling for the chaos he thought he was avoiding. Love was never part of the contract. But as it turns out—neither was sanity. Because in the business of marriage… there’s always fine print.