NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER “Gripping…how can teachers snatch back their critical role and give children the necessary space to fail? They could start by making parents read Lahey.” — New York Times Book Review In the tradition of Paul Tough’s How Children Succeed and Wendy Mogel’s The Blessing of a Skinned Knee, this groundbreaking parenting manifesto focuses on the critical school years when parents must learn to allow their children to experience the disappointment and frustration that occur from life’s inevitable problems so that they can grow up to be successful, resilient, and self-reliant adults. Modern parenting is defined by an unprecedented level of overprotectiveness: parents who rush to school at the whim of a phone call to deliver forgotten assignments, who challenge teachers on report card disappointments, mastermind children’s friendships, and interfere on the playing field. As teacher and writer Jessica Lahey explains, even though these parents see themselves as being highly responsive to their children’s well being, they aren’t giving them the chance to experience failure—or the opportunity to learn to solve their own problems and develop critical life skills. This culture of overparenting has the potential to ruin a child’s confidence and undermine their education, Lahey reminds us. Teachers don’t just teach reading, writing, and arithmetic. They teach responsibility, organization, manners, restraint, and foresight—important lessons in child development that children carry with them long after they leave the classroom. Providing a path toward solutions, Lahey lays out a blueprint with targeted advice for handling homework, report cards, social dynamics, and sports. Most importantly, she sets forth a plan to help parents learn to step back and embrace their children’s failures. Hard-hitting yet warm and wise, The Gift of Failure is essential reading for parents, educators, and psychologists nationwide who want to help children succeed. This essential guide provides a path toward solutions with targeted, evidence-based strategies for raising competent and self-reliant children. Fostering Resilience: Learn why allowing children to experience disappointment and frustration is crucial for developing the grit they need to become successful adults. - Rethinking Overparenting: Discover how rushing to deliver forgotten assignments or challenging teachers can undermine your child’s confidence and education. - Actionable Parenting Advice: Get a practical blueprint with targeted tips for handling homework, report cards, social dynamics, and sports in a way that builds crucial life skills. - Building Independence: Master the art of stepping back to embrace your children’s failures, giving them the space to learn how to solve their own problems. “This fascinating, thought-provoking book shows that to help children succeed, we must allow them to fail. Essential reading for parents, teachers, coaches, psychologists, and anyone else who wants to guide children towards lives of independence, creativity, and courage.” - Gretchen Rubin, author of The Happiness Project “Lahey offers one of the most important parenting messages of our times: Unless we allow our children to learn how to take on challenges, they won’t thrive in school and in life. Her extremely helpful book tells her story, compiles research, and provides hundreds of doable suggestions.” - Ellen Galinsky, author of Mind in the Making “Jessica Lahey had an epiphany as a teacher and parent. In her attempts to be a good parent, she was trying to make everything right for her children to protect their self-esteem and happiness. But it was wrong! She was really teaching them to fear failure. The result is an extremely helpful book, The Gift of Failure , which tells her story, shares the stories of others, compiles research, and provides hundreds of doable how-to suggestions. This is one of the most important parenting messages of our times—unless we allow our children to learn how to take on challenges, they won’t thrive in school and in life.” - Ellen Galinsky, author of Mind in the Making “Instead of lecturing us about what we’re doing wrong, Jessica Lahey reveals what she did wrong with her own children and students—and how she systematically reformed her ways. A refreshing, practical book for parents who want to raise resilient kids but aren’t sure how to start.” - Amanda Ripley, author of The Smartest Kids in the World “Through an artful combination of anecdote and research, Lahey delivers a lesson that moms and dads badly need to learn: that failure is vital to children’s success. Any parent who pines for a saner, more informed approach to child-rearing should read this book.” - Jennifer Senior, author of All Joy and No Fun “Lahey has many wise and helpful words...ones that any parent can and should embrace.” - Publishers Weekly “Jessica Lahey aims for the heart of every parent’s fondest wish: How can I help this child grow to b