Are you young, eager, smart, and heading off to LA to make it big in the entertainment business? Time for a reality check: Leave your diploma at home, put your grandiose dreams on hold (where hopefully they'll get tired and hang up), and start by repeating the first rule of the industry: Who you work for is more important than who you are. Then leapfrog over everyone else by reading The Hollywood Assistants Handbook . Written by two very sharp and successful assistants to HPPs (Hollywood Power Players), here are 86 lessons packed with a combination of blunt truth, insider humor, and juicy secrets that explain the unwritten rules of how to get a foot in the door and make all the right moves as you climb to the top. Here are the minimum-wage jobs that will put you in the path of HPPs. An annotated resume roundup. The clubs to frequent and the cocktails to order. Movies to watch and books to read (it's called homework). Dressing do's and don'ts. How to get on the Free List. A lineup of boss genres—the Horror Show, the Romantic Comedy, Mr. Action—and how to dodge the tirades that will soon be hurled your way, along with the proper outlets for venting. Plus, the ins and outs of your most important tool, the telephone—when to listen in (always!), who to put through and who to put off, and your new best friend forever, the Plantronics CS70 cordless headset. With its hilariously snarky tone—the gate-keeping quiz is "How to Tell if You're a Moron Who Should Pack Up the Corolla and Move Back Home"— The Hollywood Assistants Handbook is as baldly entertaining for everyone who loves reading about Hollywood as it is indispensably practical for the job-seeker. It's the assistant, and here at last is the essential book for how to get a foot in the door and begin your exhilarating climb to Hollywood Power Player. The Hollywood Assistants Handbook is the ultimate insider's guide, packed with practical tips, unwritten rules (#37: Please don't touch the celebrities), quizzes, industry secrets, humor and advice ( "Giveaways are never given. They're traded. Most likely for your soul…" ) All of it priceless knowledge for anyone who's ever dreamed of making it in la-la land. Been there, done that, kept notes: • Minimum-wage workplaces to put you in the path of HPPs • Perfect that resume • Homework: the must-see movies, the must-read books • What to wear to your first interview • Boss genres and personality types • The 18 favorite insults • How to roll calls • Swag! • To gift or not to gift: the holiday dilemma • Why there is nothing better than interns • The 20-10-10 trick to reading a screenplay • Your very own entourage • Appropriate company party behavior • Fail up • Knowing when to quit • Rolodex management Used Book in Good Condition