*** Please note that this is NOT Stephenie Meyer's Midnight Sun but a light and reverent parody ***With gentle satire and wry humour, Midnight Sunburn shows the unfolding of Edward Cullen's fierce love for the mysteriously closed Bella Swan, explains how he overcomes his thirst for her blood, and reveals why he would rather watch her die than transform her into a vampire. It also divulges what Edward uses to paint on his abs, explains why he can’t use smartphones, and gives the reader a glimpse of Carlisle and Esme in WalMart. Reviews for a previous version of Midnight Sunburn:“I just needed closure. This book provided it delightfully.”“This is exactly what I've been craving as a fan. It's just spectacular.”“Surprisingly good book. Really good job.”“Wow! I would highly recommend to everyone who enjoys the Twilight series to read this.”“This book was well worth my time. Truly enjoyed this treat and will tell others about it.”“I have waited so long for this book. I didn't even know it existed. I thankfully stumbled across it yesterday and bought it. This book is EVERYTHING I wanted and then some.”