Writing very bad poetry requires talent.  It helps to have a wooden ear for words, a penchant for sinking into a mire of sentimentality, and an enviable confidence that allows one to write despite absolutely appalling incompetence. The 131 poems collected in this first-of-its-kind anthology are so glaringly awful that they embody a kind of genius.  From Fred Emerson Brooks' "The Stuttering Lover" to Matthew Green's "The Spleen" to Georgia Bailey Parrington's misguided "An Elegy to a Dissected Puppy", they mangle meter, run rampant over rhyme, and bludgeon us into insensibility with their grandiosity, anticlimax, and malapropism. Guaranteed to move even the most stoic reader to tears (of laughter), Very Bad Poetry is sure to become a favorite of the poetically inclined (and disinclined). Diet by John Armstrong 11. by Alfred Austin 12. by Alfred Austin And Do They Wear That Lubricating Lie by Alfred Austin But The Fleet Hours Pass Pitilessly Fleeter by Alfred Austin Part 1. by Alfred Austin Lord Stanhope Hit Upon A Novel Plan by T. Baker Yet Here, Tho' Amusing The Sight by Samuel Bently Come, Lowly Ones, And Take Your Places Now by Marion Albina Bigelow Two Smothered Children by Marion Albina Bigelow Equality by Edwin Emanuel Bradford His Mother Drinks by Edwin Emanuel Bradford There Was A Woman Lived In Winston-salem by I. J. Brittain From Thine Eyrie, The Crag by Fred Emerson Brooks The New Baby by Fred Emerson Brooks The Stuttering Lover by Fred Emerson Brooks Her Lips Disclosed To View by Solyman Brown Whene'er Along The Ivory Disks, Are Seen by Solyman Brown Between Our Folding Lips by Thomas Edward Brown A Holland Brick by Wallace Bruce The Wanderer: 5. In Holland: Going Back Again by Edward George Earle Lytton Bulwer-lytton I Found A Corpse, With Golden Hair by Edward Robert Bulwer-lytton She Is Talking Aesthetics, The Dear Clever Creature by Edward Robert Bulwer-lytton Dear Mother by Henry Cuyler Bunner A Real Romance by Henry Cuyler Bunner Alas! Carolina! by J. Gordon Coogler Byron by J. Gordon Coogler Charming Steel Horse by J. Gordon Coogler God Correctly Understood by J. Gordon Coogler I Dreamed The Other Night by J. Gordon Coogler More Care For The Neck Than For The Intellect by J. Gordon Coogler O That The Lilies And Roses Were Mine by J. Gordon Coogler A Pretty Girl by J. Gordon Coogler Becalmed In The Tropics by Eliza Cook I Plunged My Beak In The Marbling Cheek by Eliza Cook A Pathetic Lament (on People Visiting A Castle) by Eliza Cook There Are Hearts -- Stout Hearts, -- That Own No Fear by Eliza Cook A Varied Theme It Utters by Eliza Cook Corn, Corn, Sweet Indian Corn by William W. Cook Only One Eye by Lillian E. Curtis The Potato by Lillian E. Curtis The Two Bears by Lillian E. Curtis Lines 82 - 129 by Dante Alighieri Kansas by J. P. Dunn An Ode To Governor Capper by J. P. Dunn The Homeward Bound Passenger Ship by Edward Edwin Foot A Lisp In Numbers by Edward Edwin Foot Lord Arnold Delicately Sought To Name by Edward Edwin Foot 'hullo!' by Sam Walter Foss The Northeast Wind Did Briskly Blow by James Grainger The Sugar Cane by James Grainger In Praise Of Water-gruel by Matthew Green Albert Victor Loved His Mother by Joseph Gwyer At Evening Too The Dazzled Light by Joseph Gwyer His Request by Joseph Gwyer Intoxicating Draughts He Never Does Drink by Joseph Gwyer To Alfred Gwyer by Joseph Gwyer Ada Queetie Dead by Nancy Luce A Tragedy by Theophile Julius Henry Marzials Accidents by William Mcgonagall April 8th by William Mcgonagall Death by William Mcgonagall God Sent The Whale by William Mcgonagall The Late Sir John Ogilvy by William Mcgonagall Pitiful Sight by William Mcgonagall The Procession by William Mcgonagall Queen Victoria by William Mcgonagall Railway Bridge by William Mcgonagall Railway Bridge by William Mcgonagall The Tay Bridge Disaster by William Mcgonagall Watch-cases by William Mcgonagall The Ancient Poets Ne'er Did Dream by James Mcintyre Disaster To Steamer Victoria At London by James Mcintyre Ode On The Mammoth Cheese (weighing Over 7,000 Pounds) by James Mcintyre Prophecy Of A Ten Ton Cheese by James Mcintyre Shelley by James Mcintyre When We Do Trace Out Nature's Laws by James Mcintyre Wooden Leg by James Mcintyre A Sermon To Our Later Prodigal Son by George Meredith Animals by James Lewis Milligan A Child's Thought by Bertha Moore Air -- Roll On, Silver Moon by Julia A. Moore The Ashtabula Disaster by Julia A. Moore Enos Page The Youngest Brother by Julia A. Moore Hiram Helsel by Julia A. Moore Month Of May by Julia A. Moore One Morning In April, A Short Time Ago by Julia A. Moore She Had Blue Eyes And Light Flaxen Hair by Julia A. Moore What I Have Wrote by Julia A. Moore When Mr. Dennis Does Well Play