Wall Street is a funny business. All you have is your reputation. Taint it and someone else will fill your shoes. Longevity comes from maintaining that reputation. Ask Jack Grubman, the All-Star telecom analyst from Salomon Smith Barney; uber-banker Frank Quattrone at CS First Boston; Morgan Stanley's Mary "Queen of the Net" Meeker; or Merrill Lynch's Henry Blodget. Well, they probably won't tell you anything. But have I got some great stories for you. Successful hedge fund manager Andy Kessler looks back on his years as an analyst on Wall Street and offers this cautionary tale of the intoxicating forces loose in the world of finance that overwhelmed sober analysis. “A deliciously naughty new book. [Kessler] was right there, on the inside. Having made his fortune, he now seems to feel free to say what he wants about his former firms and colleagues. [It] will not particularly please them...it will interest the rest of us. I finished it in a gulp, perfectly astonished.” - Michael Lewis on Bloomberg News “No fly or flower on the wall, Kessler was a major player on the field... but unlike most of the inebriated cast of rollicking tale, Kessler never lost his head or sense of proportion. He got on top, with his humor, writing flair, integrity, and portfolio intact. Wall Street Meat [is] the most riotous, insightful, poignant, gossipy, and gallivanting book on Wall Street ever written.” - George Gilder “Wall Street Meat is a page-turner easily consumed in one New-York-to-San-Francisco plane ride. You’ll laugh so hard you’ll risk arrest by an Air Marshall.” - Rich Karlgaard, Forbes “The most insightful and readable inside look at the world of finance since Michael Lewis’ Liar’s Poker. Rich in anecdote and told in a breezy self-effacing voice.” - Washington Post “In Andy Kessler’s cheeky Wall Street Meat, we are seated in the front row of all the action, tension and chaos of the stock market during the internet meltdown.” - USA Today Wall Street is a funny business. All you have is your reputation. Taint it and someone else will fill your shoes. Longevity comes from maintaining that reputation. Ask Jack Grubman, the All-Star telecom analyst from Salomon Smith Barney; uber-banker Frank Quattrone at CS First Boston; Morgan Stanley's Mary "Queen of the Net" Meeker; or Merrill Lynch's Henry Blodget. Well, they probably won't tell you anything. But have I got some great stories for you. Successful hedge fund manager Andy Kessler looks back on his years as an analyst on Wall Street and offers this cautionary tale of the intoxicating forces loose in the world of finance that overwhelmed sober analysis. After turning $100 million into $1 billion riding the technology wave of the late 1990s, Andy Kessler recounted his experiences on Wall Street and in the trenches of the hedge fund industry in the books Wall Street Meat and Running Money (and its companion volume, How We Got Here ). Though he has retired from actively managing other people's money, he remains a passionate and curious investor. Unable to keep his many opinions to himself, he contributes to the Wall Street Journal , Wired , and lots of Web sites on a variety of Wall Street and technology-related topics, and is often seen on CNBC, FOX, and CNN. He lives in Silicon Valley like all the other tech guys. Excerpt Chapter One Right 51% of the Time I dialed the phone number in the ad. "Hello, Research," said the woman on the other end of the line. "Huh???" I thought. "Research?" "If you could be so kind, may I speak with Robert Cornell, please?" I can turn on polite in a hurry. "He's gone for the day. May I take a message?" "Have him call Andy Kessler at this number, and by theway, research where?" "Paine Webber." Now I had seen the Thank You Paine Webber commercialswith Jimmy Connors but had no clue what Paine Webber evenwas. No problem, I'll figure it out tomorrow. It's 1985 and I'm 26 and in no rush. Bob called back the next morning. He had a deep exotic,take-charge phone voice. He grilled me on my background,and then asked when we could meet. I was headed into Manhattan from my house in New Jersey to meet with a head-hunterwho placed programmers and tech people in temporaryassignments. I could meet for lunch. I decided to wear the best clothes I had. A maroon shirt,navy blue wool tie and double knit Haggar slacks. No jacket. Itwas very early Geek Chic, circa 1985. I ran into a college friendon 51st and 6th Avenue, who asked me where I was headed."An interview at Paine Webber." He gave me one of those you-dumb-shit looks. "Dressed like that?" OK, so I was a dumb-shit, and now a self-consciouslyunderdressed one. At 1285 Avenue of the Americas, I took theelevator up to the ninth floor and headed to the receptionist.Behind me, a door opened briefly. I caught a glimpse of awhole roomful of people who were yelling at each other andinto phones. What a strange place. The reception area wasfilled with the worst art I had ever seen, ugly contem